Jumbled Thoughts

I sometimes think that i'm a selfish person. selfish because i refuse to tolerate things which annoy me, selfish because even though i want to, sometimes i just cant. is it a crime to forever hold a pet peeve against a certain something? are people supposed to be that tolerant - to look at something, figure out what amnoys them about it, overcome it, and move on to become better? if this is the case, then am i the only one who is unable to do it?
 
when something causes you to hurt, to be angry, are you supposed to just get over it? dont people have the right to be mad, the right to like and dislike certain things? i dont know whether this is a case of lack of compassion on someone else's part, or lack of understanding on mine. it could be both. but compromise is such a hard path to take, and more pride-battering than just being angry.
 
i went to starbucks the other night. sitting at a table with my mocha and caramel coffee, i watched as people and time passed me by, left me on the cusp of the hill where real life meets dreams and i simply sit and stare at the star-filled sky like a child. Alone in the noisy cafe, i felt more content than i have felt anywhere else since i've come back. alone, i didnt need to hear anything i didnt want to, didnt need to face anything i didnt want to. no confrontations, no fights, no misery. i wish for that feeling every day. is it fair to shut myself away from the world when it all just gets too much?
 
i dont know why, but it seems lately that im asking too many questions. my posts are made up of questions, questions, questions and no answers. i have always considered myself a logical person, always thought that there was a logical answer to every situation. i guess i know now that logic never wins in the onslaught of emotion, at least initially. it gets swept up in a wave of feeling, washed away to some desert island where it screams to be heard.